You might’ve heard of Internal Family Systems (IFS) while scrolling on Instagram or TikTok. Suddenly, everyone is calling themselves “IFS-informed” or “IFS coaches.”
But what exactly does this jargon mean? Is it a revolutionary approach to self-discovery or just another unnecessary acronym to make your LinkedIn look fancy?
In this article, I answer all your questions about IFS-informed coaching for executives, including:
- What is Internal Family Systems?
- How does Internal Family Systems apply to coaching?
- What is an IFS-informed coach?
- Is IFS coaching the same as therapy? (Spoiler: nope!)
- Do I need to know IFS to work with an IFS-informed coach? (Spoiler: also, no!)
- What questions should I ask before working with an IFS coach?
What Is Internal Family Systems?
You can think of IFS as being like conversations between your different personalities. It’s a way to identify, name, and externalize your inner dialogue so that you can gain a new perspective.
This strategy can be particularly helpful when dealing with career, leadership, and life challenges, as it allows you to move beyond the surface and truly uncover what might be getting in the way of you achieving your goals.
One of the things I appreciate most about IFS is that it’s strengths-based. In the IFS model, all of your parts belong, and they each bring value to you and your system.
In the words of Dr. Richard Schwartz, the founder of Internal Family Systems, “The IFS Model… views a person as containing an ecology of relatively discrete minds, each of which has valuable qualities and each of which is designed to—and wants to—play a valuable role within.”
How Does Internal Family Systems Apply To Coaching?
As we navigate all the different parts of ourselves, IFS already comes up naturally in our lives—and inherently, in coaching sessions. Simply put, IFS-informed coaching adds a new lens, sometimes subtly and other times directly, to traditional coaching work.
We still apply all the foundational aspects of coaching but with an added layer of curiosity about your inner parts.
What does this look like in practice? Here are a few examples of common coaching topics and how IFS might apply:
- If you’re struggling to decide between two job offers, we might explore the different parts of you that are drawn to each one (perhaps one values stability while another craves growth) and work toward an aligned decision.
- If you want clarity on how to speak up to your difficult boss, we might identify the parts of you that fear conflict and those that value self-advocacy, helping you communicate with confidence, calmness, and true authenticity.
- If you feel stuck about your next career step, we might get curious about the parts of you that feel hesitant and the parts that are ready to take bold action, creating space for both to be heard before moving forward.
Of course, these examples are simplified, but they offer you a high-level understanding of how IFS coaching might look in a coaching session. My hope is that they help you see how this methodology can be a powerful tool to help you get unstuck and gain clarity.
What Is IFS-Informed Coaching?
Currently, many service providers are calling themselves “IFS coaches” after taking a free online course or webinar. This has led to a lot of confusion—and, let’s be honest, some people claiming titles they haven’t truly earned.
An “IFS-informed coach” is someone who has been trained to understand the role that internal family systems play in the coaching journey and support clients in exploring, understanding, and working with their internal parts to achieve clarity, alignment, and action toward their goals.
The IFS Institute, founded by Dr. Richard Schwartz, the creator of Internal Family Systems, houses the one and only officially recognized IFS coaching program. Ensure your coach has attended their training program if they claim to be an “IFS coach” or “IFS-informed coach.” (Note: I completed the IFS Foundations for Coaches training through the Institute.)
I share all of this because IFS can get very deep very quickly, and it’s essential that you work with a trained coach who has completed advanced, official training.
Choosing an improperly trained coach can not only limit your results but also negatively impact your mental health. This is very deep, emotional work. Avoid coaches claiming IFS competency without proper credentials and verified trauma-informed training, as the work can bring up intense feelings that require skilled, experienced navigation.
Is IFS Coaching The Same As Therapy?
There are several similarities between IFS-informed coaching and mental health therapy, including looking inward, engaging in deep reflection, and exploring the parts of yourself that influence your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.
While IFS-informed coaching can feel therapeutic, it’s not the same as therapy and doesn’t replace it. Therapy can’t substitute for mental health treatment. Therapists typically complete at least a master’s degree in marriage and family therapy, counseling, social work, or a similar field before practicing.
They have also completed state licensing requirements to practice therapy. In California, mental health professionals must complete 3,000 supervised hours, an ethics exam, and a clinical exam to become a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) or a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor (LPCC).
Coaching, on the other hand, isn’t about diagnosing you. It’s focused on helping you get unstuck, clarify your goal, and achieve your full potential.
[Read: How To Know Whether You Need A Coach Or A Therapist]
Is IFS Coaching Helpful For Executives?
Absolutely. IFS coaching can be particularly powerful for executives who want to reach new levels of leadership that traditional coaching or outdated approaches just haven’t been able to unlock.
We can use IFS to explore common executive coaching topics like increasing influence, prioritization, decision-making, and managing challenging team dynamics. Really, virtually anything that comes up in a coaching session can be explored through an IFS lens to uncover the internal parts influencing your behaviors and impact.
I’ve found that IFS helps leaders more deeply understand the internal dynamics that influence their decisions, communication, and workplace interactions. This greater self-awareness allows them to move through work—and really the world—with more clarity, confidence, and authenticity.
Many of the leaders I work with describe IFS as a game-changer for tackling complex problems they can’t seem to solve any other way. By identifying and working with the parts of themselves that get in the way—like the overachiever, the perfectionist, or the conflict-averse part—they’re able to make decisions from a place of centered self-leadership instead of stress or reaction.
Both my executive and tech clients appreciate the fact that IFS Institute has been around for decades and is backed by tons of peer-reviewed research.
Does IFS Coaching Help Prevent Burnout?
IFS-informed coaching can be particularly helpful for navigating stress, overwhelm, and burnout. It can help you “unblend” and “update” the parts of you that are overworking, people-pleasing, or carrying the weight of unrealistic expectations.
“Unblending” is an IFS term for the process of separating from a part so you can observe it with curiosity rather than becoming consumed by it. In a coaching session, this might look like stepping back from parts that are driving burnout and noticing their influence without letting them take over.
Also an IFS term, “updating” is the process of helping a part shift outdated roles or beliefs it took on in the past so that it can operate from a healthier place in the present. For my tech clients, I often describe it as a software update for your sub-personalities—like rewriting old code so your internal system runs more smoothly. During a session, a part that learned to overwork or people-please to keep you safe can be updated to support your goals without draining your energy.
Important: If you’re feeling extreme stress or burnout, please avoid trying to self-administer IFS without professional guidance, as unblending intense parts on your own can be harmful and even backfire.
Do I Need To Know IFS To Work With An IFS-Informed Coach?
It’s a common question. No, you don’t need to have any familiarity with IFS to work with an IFS-informed coach. In fact, not being familiar with the model can be helpful at times, since you’re not trying to analyze or logically apply it during your sessions but can instead really tune into your senses and feelings.
Personally, I hadn’t even heard of IFS before I completed the official IFS Foundations for Coaches training program through IFS Institute.
What Questions Should I Ask Before Working With An IFS-Informed Coach?
If you decide you’d like to work with an IFS-informed coach, you must conduct your due diligence, as not all IFS-informed coaches are created equal.
Questions To Ask A Prospective IFS-Informed Coach
The following are questions to consider as you review potential practitioners to support you. As you vet coaches, avoid anyone who can’t clearly answer these critical questions.
- Where did you complete your training in Internal Family Systems? Research where the coach completed their training program and independently verify their graduation and current good standing. Note: Only programs offered by IFS Institute are official. There are no exceptions as of the writing of this article. This is your internal system we’re talking about. Make sure your coach did their training through IFS Institute.
- What is your training in trauma-informed coaching? Engaging with IFS can bring up a lot of difficult topics, yet not all IFS-informed coaches are up-to-date on the latest trauma-informed best practices. You deserve a coach who has completed specific advanced training in trauma-informed coaching.
- What other methodologies, if any, do you incorporate into your practice? Are they strictly an IFS coach, or do they leverage additional coaching methodologies? Do they rely on the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), Gallup CliftonStrengths (previously StrengthsFinder), or other assessments and inventories? If you’re seeking an executive or leadership coach, you’ll likely want a practitioner who offers a holistic approach.
- Can you provide a specific example of helping a client resolve their internal conflict between parts? Real coaches will have ample examples they can anonymize and share with you. Ask for a concrete example that demonstrates the coach’s ability to help clients identify their distinct parts, untangle their internal dynamics, create internal dialogue, and make empowered choices.
- What’s your approach when my “inner critic” shows up mid-session? Nearly every executive has a perfectionist, overachieving, or similar “manager” part. A strong coach won’t let it hijack the session. They’ll help you notice it, understand it, and work through it with curiosity instead of shame or judgment.
- How do you handle moments when a client becomes emotionally activated? IFS work can be emotional. You want a coach who can help you observe your parts without getting consumed by them while keeping you feeling grounded and safe. Look for someone who has a clear, practiced approach to helping clients navigate strong reactions. Take note of their demeanor, energy, and sense of self during your chemistry call (consultation).
- How do you measure progress in IFS-informed coaching? While IFS-informed coaching can get emotional, to get the most out of it you have to have outcomes. You need more than feel-good sessions. A strong coach will be able to articulate how they support clients in tracking their progress over time.
- What is your experience coaching executives specifically? We all have an internal system, which is what makes IFS work at every level, but executive coaching—especially with IFS—requires a very special type of coach. Ask how they’ve supported leaders in managing team dynamics and strategic decision-making in high-stakes environments through an IFS lens.
- Do you provide support between sessions if challenging parts come up? Sometimes a part will become challenging and throw your focus entirely off. An experienced coach can empower you with tactical, actionable exercises to stay aligned until your next session.
Final Thoughts On IFS Coaching For Executives
The idea of working with different parts of yourself, tapping into your Self, and understanding the internal dynamics that drive your decisions and behaviors can feel a little strange (or maybe even a lot strange) during the first session or two. Still, IFS-informed coaching is a powerful way to gain clarity, align your actions with your values, and navigate challenges with confidence and authenticity.
If you have any questions about IFS-informed coaching for executives or want to explore how I can help you reach your career and leadership goals, I’d love to chat—please schedule a consultation. I’m here for you! You’ve got this!
